Appreciation

How often do you express appreciation for your partner? Appreciation is a little different than a compliment, a 'thank you', or words of affection. It has to do with really noticing the things your partner does that you admire or that make your life a little easier and then acknowledging those things with specific language.

Take the stone wall my husband just built around my new herb garden. It took about 6 hours of hot, sweaty labor lifting 20 pound stones. And there were a lot of stones. I could have said, "Thanks, honey - I really appreciate it", but it has more meaning when I take the time to say, "You put such care and effort into every project you do. Using a level, building up the low side, arranging and rearranging the stones for the best fit - you're a real craftsman. I would never have had the patience for it."

We have a need not just for gratitude but for acknowledgment of our skills and our contributions. Feeling taken for granted or feeling unappreciated by your partner is not exactly lust-inspiring. Appreciation is one more thing to add to your foreplay list.