If you're in a relationship but don't experience much spontaneous desire, there's probably a 'should' rattling around somewhere in your head - or maybe several 'shoulds'. "I should make sex a higher priority." "I should just go along when my partner wants it." "I should have more of an interest in sex." I frequently tell my clients to stop shoulding on themselves!
What's the problem with shoulds? The problem is that 'should' invites rebellion. 'Should' comes from the parental part of us and is often sabotaged by our inner child. A much more effective approach is to dig deeper and find the 'want' to change certain behaviors. "I want a closer relationship with my partner." "I want to tap into my sexual energy." "I want to enjoy touching and being touched." Just changing the wording may seem like a small thing, but it's a big leap from should to want.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment