In order for most women to enjoy sex, they need to learn to relax, let go of control, and focus on pleasurable physical sensations. Anxious or extraneous thoughts break concentration and disrupt the trance of increasing arousal.
Because most women are easily distracted sexually, they must train themselves to focus and shut out the outside world. Without that focus, women can easily lose their arousal and find themselves back at square one. So how do you stay focused?
Women need to pursue sexual arousal and/or orgasm as single-mindedly as they pursue any other goal that is important to them. It's about taking charge and thinking the thoughts that enhance arousal. If you're not thinking sexy thoughts, the dishwasher that needs to be emptied is likely to jump in to fill the void. If the dishwasher does pop up, you yank your attention back to the sexual landscape. Initially this may take some effort, but you'll get better with practice. Being sexually present is a skill that's well worth practicing.
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