Pleasure or Chore?

Having just returned from vacation, I'm struggling a bit with re-entry. Jumping immediately from days of leisure in which the most demanding task was deciding where to eat lunch to a schedule packed with appointments, piles of laundry, and thirsty plants is a harsh transition. My to-do list has exploded - and I thought of my frequent reminder to clients to keep sex on their to-do list. I'm rethinking that advice.

Unfortunately, the items on most people's to-do lists are chores. I really don't want anyone putting sex in the same category as mowing the grass, taking the dog to the vet, or cleaning out the garage. I just want people to understand that sex can easily be squeezed out of our lives by all those endless tasks that sap both time and energy.

Sex is a pleasure - but a forgotten pleasure for many. When you're on vacation, pleasure is the whole point and sex happens easily. When you come home, you have to be intentional about preserving some of that vacation mindset. So if your to-do list contains only have-to's, maybe you need a separate list of want-to's - and some specific ideas about how to make room for them.