Forgiveness How-To

Yesterday's post was about the benefits of forgiveness. But how do you get there when you just can't seem to let go of a grievance?

If you were hurt by someone you love, consider whether or not their intent was to hurt you. If their behavior was simply thoughtless or insensitive, that doesn't make it ok but it also may not warrant a full-fledged pity party. Try to understand the situation from the other person's point of view.

Decide what you need to do to feel better. Options include confronting the person who harmed you, journaling, talking to a neutral party, going for a run, engaging in a few rounds with a punching bag, doing some deep breathing, meditating, and choosing to live in the moment rather than in the past.

You don't have a lot of control over other people's behavior, but you always retain control over how you respond to it. Don't forget that you have the freedom to choose whether to stew in your angry juices or take positive action to restore your peace of mind.