Once you've stopped taking your partner's sexual disinterest personally or stopped assuming that all your partner wants from you is sex, you can begin to figure out how both of you can get your needs met. Start by asking each other about the desired frequency of sex and then negotiate a compromise. The lower desire person is often surprised to learn that their partner doesn't actually want sex every day. (They may try everyday but that's because they may feel like it's the only way to get it once a week!)
After deciding on frequency, then talk about how you can make it happen. If you're the person with little interest, share what helps spark your desire. Talk about your preferred startup, favorite time of day, and other conditions that help you relax and get in the mood. Agree to work together to make sex a priority and to save some time and energy for each other.
When you're both working toward a common goal in your sexual relationship, you'll not only grow closer from the enhanced sexual intimacy but will experience less tension and conflict in your everyday interactions. It's worth the effort to make sex work for your relationship rather than against it.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment